Advice from future selves

01Aug08
Does BuyBuyBaby have flux capacitors?

Does BuyBuyBaby have flux capacitors?

A lot of people have given me advice on the first few weeks of fatherhood.  Most of it comes with “don’t worry…” attached to the front of it.   Yet I still worry.

So I asked a bunch of Twittererer parent-bloggers for the advice they’d provide if they could go back in time and visit their rookie, first-week-of-parenting selves.   Thought I’d share some of those here.

The most complete response came from copywritermom, who created a whole post on it for her blog that  really covers the topic well.   She tackles the issues of self-doubt and feeling trapped.   One of her good suggestions is that you make sure to take a break from the nest now and then, even if it means just sitting outside.  I imagine myself clutching my knees with my arms, rocking back and forth on my porch, twitching while the neighbors point, but I understand the sentiment.

Here are some others, and I’m including them precisely as they appear on Twitter so that this blog will be imbued with the light of SMS/microblogging-style abbreviations and emoticons.   I am told this will make it so that you readers go “viral” and really start becoming “evangelists” on the “Internets.”   Maybe soon you will even take DoB “mobile.”   <starts doing the Macarena>

I’d go back & tell myself the constant crying won’t last forever.” – angelashupe, who writes Write to Press

Sleep when the baby sleeps! :)” mommydx, who writes The Parental Gamer

“You won’t remember this first week because of the sleep deprivation.”icelander, who writes Move to Iceland

They really mean it, I should have slept when she did. To bank it up. (best wishes!)” – Kim Wood, who sells houses in Chester County, PA

“I would have told myself to relax. And not to worry about visitors, should have just had select company for the first few wks!” daddyrockstar, who writes daddyrockstar

“I would tell myself not to be upset by the “friends” who showed their true colors(jealousy) by not supporting/celebrating with me.”MakesMeHoller, who writes Makes Me Wanna Holler

Relax! You aren’t going to screw it up. oh, and don’t drop the baby. ;)”momneedstherapy, who writes Mommy Needs Therapy

This last one confused me at first as I had forgotten that I’d asked what people would tell their former selves.  But then it made me feel so good I wanted to buy a new dress…

Don’t cry, you’ll lose the weight. And it’ll be easier than you think. Really. You’re pretty!”thedailydigress, who writes The Daily Digress

Do you have some more advice for me and the rest of the world’s clueless about-to-be-new-fathers?  Do you want to play a cruel joke on us and get us to do something really dumb?

Feel free to leave a comment.    You no longer have to register to leave a comment.  The Twittererers taught me that was stupid.

<end Macarena>

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9 Responses to “Advice from future selves”

  1. Thanks for the link! It looks like Twitterers agree about sleeping when the baby sleeps. This is a big one, but it goes against your instincts sometimes.

    I forgot to add one point. And, it’s sort of a catch-22… As a parent, I want to tell you not to worry about blogging your experience in those first few days, but as a reader, I’m still interested to hear how it goes! 🙂

  2. Sweet! Just know that parenting will be the hardest, yet most rewarding thing you’ve ever done…

  3. 3 theshoptart

    Loved this post! And here’s my advice to dads-to-be:

    If your wife, one week after a c-section preceded by a pregnancy in which she gained 80 pounds, is hiding in the hallway, pulling a nightgown over her head, do not walk onto the hallway and say,

    “Pretty!”

    No matter how funny that joke may have been in the past, it won’t be funny right then. But I really enjoyed watching my husband try to suck that exclamation right back into his mouth. Ha!

    Best of luck!
    Annie

  4. 4 theshoptart

    My apologies – “theshoptart” is me, Annie of the Daily Digress. I have two blogs and get confused about how I’m logged in!

  5. Annie, I do that too! 🙂

    BTW Dadorbust – I just noticed the photo & caption you included with this post. Don’t know how I missed it the first time, but I’m cracking up.

  6. 6 starrbuckdaddy

    Thank you for the wonderful advice!

    Being a newly minted father-to-be within the next week, I’m looking for good advice that doesn’t include the words, “Dude, your life is over…”

  7. “Sleep when the baby sleeps! :)” – good luck with that…you will either be:

    a) starring at the baby
    b) cleaning/moving/building things, writing thank you’s, sorting out birth announcements
    c) changing the baby
    d) strung out on coffee, not able to sleep

    There is plenty of time to sleep when you are dead…


  1. 1 The First 24 Hours of Parenthood :: Daddy Rockstar!
  2. 2 The first five days « dad or bust

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